Noise. It's so hard for me to find quiet places lately. My introverted self is not happy...whenever I finally do find somewhere that isn't noisy or filled with distractions, I almost always find a way to distract myself with my own thoughts or excuses for not focusing.
I know that life is not meant to be lived alone, and I enjoy being around people most of the time. Probably I am feeling so dragged down because of trying to balance so much this semester, and while classes are done, there is a lot of uncertainty ahead that is still stressing me out. On the outside, I have it all together and try to be all in to whatever I am doing in the moment. But inside, I feel scattered, frustrated, and ready for change. I should have no complaints about my life...i am so blessed and i take simple comforts for granted every day. I have had so many great opportunities, some that I have actively made the most of, but others which i have allowed myself to be passive and settle, especially recently. Maybe the heart of my problem is the separation between who i am and who i want to be.
I have a feeling this is going to be one of those impulsive posts that i look back on and wonder why i just spewed to a screen. I know i'm being negative and whiny and self-centered. Well, this is just the way i am perceiving life right now-better to be honest and real in the moment than fake it, right?
Lately i've been feeling a dull sense of emptiness that I can't quite wrap my head around. It's not overwhelming and i'm not depressed or anything, but i just feel like i'm waiting for something to happen. I've repeatedly caught myself saying that everything going on in my life has been busy, but also really good. No matter whether things are good or bad or somewhere in between, i'm starting to wonder if i'm experiencing a deficiency in joy.
Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, and faithful in prayer. (Rom 12:12)
Splendor and majesty are before him; strength and joy are in his dwelling place. (1 Chr 16:27)
I'll stop with those for now, but there are tons of "joy" references in the Bible. Especially during this Christmas season, it is a joyful time! So my challenge to myself (and whoever may be reading this?) is to find more joy in the little things--I shouldn't have to look too hard because joy can be found in pretty much anything.
Instead of worrying, maybe I need to give my brain a rest and live more joyfully with my heart. Maybe, i need to trust HIM unswervingly...not just when it's convenient or makes logical sense...but to trust him all the time with the little worries of my little life. It's not about me, anyway. I have a bad memory, but it shouldn't be that hard to remember that this whole life thing--is not about me at all.
Thursday, December 15, 2011
Sunday, November 13, 2011
chrome://history/
It's really no wonder why I've been so flustered lately...after looking at my surfing history, the majority of the sites I go to are not productive or reflecting my priorities well at all. Facebook, ESPN, USATF, cooking blogs, Twitter, weather, fantasy football...all potentially good things, just on overload! Should I go cold turkey on these things? Nope, that's just not realistic. The Internet is awesome, but it's so easy to get sucked in to unnecessary gossip, opinions, and counterproductive information. So even though study breaks and "fun" breaks are needed at times, I can definitely step back and stop my bad habit of going to random sites that put my brain cells through more work.
Goal this week: let the important stuff make up the majority of my surfing history. With that, I'm typing a visit to biblegateway.com...
"The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace." -Romans 8:6, NIV
Goal this week: let the important stuff make up the majority of my surfing history. With that, I'm typing a visit to biblegateway.com...
"The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace." -Romans 8:6, NIV
Friday, November 11, 2011
Pilot studies all around!
Recently I sent a pilot study to some of my old teammates. I received a ton of great responses and helpful feedback, which made me really excited for the upcoming master's project research I'll be doing. It's going to be a long haul this winter, but I have to keep reminding myself that it will be worth it. I want it to mean something to at least one person, and already I'm pretty sure that has happened.
I've also had a great running week--filled with runs where I just felt strong, runs that I was able to enjoy the fall sunsets/sunrises (!), and runs that just needed to happen as a mental break. In the midst of all the dimensions of things I'm attempting to "get together" these days, I always am able to think clearer and more creatively while running. Running buddies and endorphins help, too! Lately I've been thinking about how unsettled and unfocused I've been this semester. But somehow on runs I'm always put at ease and often come up with interesting ideas, too. I truly believe that God works in a variety of ways to get our attention and help us wake up from going through the motions. Personally, God speaks to me most often through training because I am less distracted and more willing to listen than during the other parts of my day.
While I've been so uncertain and indecisive about, well, most things in life, I've also been feeling like I have to do everything right throughout my day. The rigid plans I make, and the continual failure to actually follow through with a set schedule keeps dragging me down. I make excuses and just get distracted so easily. "Follow through" has been a popular thought as well. I just never feel like I'm content or doing my best at trying to balance a lot of different roles. But what do I do? Take on more!
This is by no means an entry that will make a lot of sense, and maybe I will look back on it and think how dumb I was in retrospect. But I'm going to throw out the thought that since so much of what I'm doing right now seems uncertain, scattered, wishy-washy, whatever...all these commitments and roles I'm taking on are really just pilot studies. I still don't know what I want to do with my life, and I know that is just fine. But I'm on the right track (pun?) by trying to gain experience in a lot of different sport settings. Emphasis: a LOT. Between school, my assistantship, working, coaching, and training, not to mention all the people who have influenced me and who I interact with every day, it's pretty safe to say I've had a well-rounded education. Is it possible to be too well-rounded? (figuratively speaking, of course...not trying to put on any pounds this winter!)
So all these "pilot" experiences...what am I trying to get out of them? What's the point of dabbling in so many different things, yet not feel like I have an expertise in anything specific? The best answer I can think of is that everything I've been part of recently has been really good, or at least helpful with making me realize what I like and don't like...and what I'm good at and not-so-good at. It may be too early to tell, but I hope that I'm on my way to figuring out what I really want to do because of the things I've taken on this year. I also need to recognize that every job will have parts to it that I will not enjoy doing, and that even if I'm not good at something, I should want to improve at whatever that might be. I yearn to be at my best with everything I do, but maybe my failure to follow through is the Spirit's way of telling me that I'm not relying on God nearly enough.
While I commend people who know what they want and stick with it, I've settled on the idea that my inefficient route of trial and error is how God is leading me. I shouldn't speculate like that, but looking at my life right now, I don't know what else to think. In essence, my day-to-day life has become a smattering of pilot studies. However, I think each of these experiences will shape me into the person I strive to become. I have many faults, and I know no one is perfect or ever will be perfect. But at the core, I have the desire to grow and learn and ultimately impact others. So really, I'm just searching for the best avenue that God wants me to take for fulfilling that purpose. That's really what life is about, anyway! Easier said than done, obviously, but it's amazing how freeing it is to keep all these day-to-day worries in perspective. It's not about me, after all. If I consistently told myself "it's not about you" throughout the day, I wonder how much different I would think/communicate/act!
With that, I'm thankful for all these opportunities. I have been learning to say no to some things and recognize that I can't do everything, and I especially can't do everything well. Am I crazy for taking on so much? Quite possibly. But I'm really not worried, and I'm confident that God will show me the right way(s).
With that, I'm off to run a spontaneous little road race--11k at 11:11pm on 11/11/11...in what is going to feel like about 11 degrees!
I've also had a great running week--filled with runs where I just felt strong, runs that I was able to enjoy the fall sunsets/sunrises (!), and runs that just needed to happen as a mental break. In the midst of all the dimensions of things I'm attempting to "get together" these days, I always am able to think clearer and more creatively while running. Running buddies and endorphins help, too! Lately I've been thinking about how unsettled and unfocused I've been this semester. But somehow on runs I'm always put at ease and often come up with interesting ideas, too. I truly believe that God works in a variety of ways to get our attention and help us wake up from going through the motions. Personally, God speaks to me most often through training because I am less distracted and more willing to listen than during the other parts of my day.
While I've been so uncertain and indecisive about, well, most things in life, I've also been feeling like I have to do everything right throughout my day. The rigid plans I make, and the continual failure to actually follow through with a set schedule keeps dragging me down. I make excuses and just get distracted so easily. "Follow through" has been a popular thought as well. I just never feel like I'm content or doing my best at trying to balance a lot of different roles. But what do I do? Take on more!
This is by no means an entry that will make a lot of sense, and maybe I will look back on it and think how dumb I was in retrospect. But I'm going to throw out the thought that since so much of what I'm doing right now seems uncertain, scattered, wishy-washy, whatever...all these commitments and roles I'm taking on are really just pilot studies. I still don't know what I want to do with my life, and I know that is just fine. But I'm on the right track (pun?) by trying to gain experience in a lot of different sport settings. Emphasis: a LOT. Between school, my assistantship, working, coaching, and training, not to mention all the people who have influenced me and who I interact with every day, it's pretty safe to say I've had a well-rounded education. Is it possible to be too well-rounded? (figuratively speaking, of course...not trying to put on any pounds this winter!)
So all these "pilot" experiences...what am I trying to get out of them? What's the point of dabbling in so many different things, yet not feel like I have an expertise in anything specific? The best answer I can think of is that everything I've been part of recently has been really good, or at least helpful with making me realize what I like and don't like...and what I'm good at and not-so-good at. It may be too early to tell, but I hope that I'm on my way to figuring out what I really want to do because of the things I've taken on this year. I also need to recognize that every job will have parts to it that I will not enjoy doing, and that even if I'm not good at something, I should want to improve at whatever that might be. I yearn to be at my best with everything I do, but maybe my failure to follow through is the Spirit's way of telling me that I'm not relying on God nearly enough.
While I commend people who know what they want and stick with it, I've settled on the idea that my inefficient route of trial and error is how God is leading me. I shouldn't speculate like that, but looking at my life right now, I don't know what else to think. In essence, my day-to-day life has become a smattering of pilot studies. However, I think each of these experiences will shape me into the person I strive to become. I have many faults, and I know no one is perfect or ever will be perfect. But at the core, I have the desire to grow and learn and ultimately impact others. So really, I'm just searching for the best avenue that God wants me to take for fulfilling that purpose. That's really what life is about, anyway! Easier said than done, obviously, but it's amazing how freeing it is to keep all these day-to-day worries in perspective. It's not about me, after all. If I consistently told myself "it's not about you" throughout the day, I wonder how much different I would think/communicate/act!
With that, I'm thankful for all these opportunities. I have been learning to say no to some things and recognize that I can't do everything, and I especially can't do everything well. Am I crazy for taking on so much? Quite possibly. But I'm really not worried, and I'm confident that God will show me the right way(s).
With that, I'm off to run a spontaneous little road race--11k at 11:11pm on 11/11/11...in what is going to feel like about 11 degrees!
Sunday, October 2, 2011
Forgiveness Sermon
http://vimeo.com/29918187
The link above is a video of the sermon I heard this morning. Whenever I hear a sermon on this topic, my first reaction usually isn't filled with excitement. Often I think that I haven't had any huge things going on where I need to forgive someone, so this sermon won't really apply to me. Well, somehow God has a way of showing me why I need to hear something. Clearly he knows me better than I know myself...
Anyway, I felt compelled to share this. So, if you have 38 minutes to spare, i hope you enjoy and find this was well worth your time! He concludes with this quote from one of my faves, C.S. Lewis:
"There are two kinds of people in this world: those who say to God, 'Thy will be done,' and those to whom God says, 'Fine, have it your way.'
(I don't think Burger King got their slogan from C.S. Lewis, though!)
The link above is a video of the sermon I heard this morning. Whenever I hear a sermon on this topic, my first reaction usually isn't filled with excitement. Often I think that I haven't had any huge things going on where I need to forgive someone, so this sermon won't really apply to me. Well, somehow God has a way of showing me why I need to hear something. Clearly he knows me better than I know myself...
Anyway, I felt compelled to share this. So, if you have 38 minutes to spare, i hope you enjoy and find this was well worth your time! He concludes with this quote from one of my faves, C.S. Lewis:
"There are two kinds of people in this world: those who say to God, 'Thy will be done,' and those to whom God says, 'Fine, have it your way.'
(I don't think Burger King got their slogan from C.S. Lewis, though!)
Thursday, August 18, 2011
What should i do?
Well, I need to make a big decision in the next couple days, and this famous commercial epitomizes how I feel quite well!
God has been teaching me that I need to learn how to say no and not feel guilty about it. But...should I downgrade a plan I've had for almost a year in grad school? The plans I make for myself change often and I need to not let it frustrate me, because it is prideful when I try to decide what is the best plan for myself. Well, here is a good verse to take comfort in as I wait to see where God is going to lead me in this debacle :)
"I know what I'm doing. I have it all planned out--plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for." Jeremiah 29:11, MSG
I'm not exactly sure what kind of future I'm hoping for, but i pray that my indecisiveness points all the more toward the One who really does have it all together!
Sunday, August 14, 2011
Relevant verses to kick off a potentially crazy week...and semester!
Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7, NIV
For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline. 1 Timothy 1:7, NIV
Let every detail in your lives—words, actions, whatever—be done in the name of the Master, Jesus, thanking God the Father every step of the way. Colossians 3:17, MSG
Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith and in purity. 1 Timothy 4:12, NIV
There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens… Ecclesiastes 3:1, NIV
True wisdom and real power belong to God; From him we learn how to live, and also what to live for. Job 12:13, MSG
The fundamental fact of existence is that this trust in God, this faith, is the firm foundation under everything that makes life worth living. It's our handle on what we can't see. Hebrews 11:1, MSG
For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline. 1 Timothy 1:7, NIV
Let every detail in your lives—words, actions, whatever—be done in the name of the Master, Jesus, thanking God the Father every step of the way. Colossians 3:17, MSG
Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith and in purity. 1 Timothy 4:12, NIV
There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens… Ecclesiastes 3:1, NIV
True wisdom and real power belong to God; From him we learn how to live, and also what to live for. Job 12:13, MSG
The fundamental fact of existence is that this trust in God, this faith, is the firm foundation under everything that makes life worth living. It's our handle on what we can't see. Hebrews 11:1, MSG
You are good, and the source of good; train me in your goodness. Psalm 119:68, MSG
Theme of the semester: one day at a time!
Monday, July 25, 2011
Verse of the day: Don't Delay!
As I was sitting at my laptop and putting off doing work just now, I came across biblegateway.com's verse of the day:
“I will hasten and not delay to obey your commands.” -Psalm 119:60, NIV
“I will hasten and not delay to obey your commands.” -Psalm 119:60, NIV
Here's a paraphrased snippet from the Message version as well:
"When I took a long, careful look at your ways,
I got my feet back on the trail you blazed.
I was up at once, didn't drag my feet,
was quick to follow your orders."
I LOVE when things like this pop up in everyday life right when I need a wake-up call...now it's time to get to work!
I was up at once, didn't drag my feet,
was quick to follow your orders."
I LOVE when things like this pop up in everyday life right when I need a wake-up call...now it's time to get to work!
Sunday, July 24, 2011
A Humbling Lesson from Daniel
Well, it has been quite the summer! New adventures, new people, new opportunities, travelling, running, and a new lack of routine has comprised the majority of my life over the last couple months. I have often had times when I think about a good topic to blog about, but then fail to follow-up with actually writing anything because I get side-tracked or caught up in something else. I had nothing scheduled today OR tomorrow though, which meant that after I heard the sermon this morning I knew it was time to actually follow through and flesh out this sermon that struck me so perfectly. God's timing rocks, even more than the Timex tap-screen or Nike GPS watch!
Summary of Daniel 4:
The sermon title was "Dreams of Falling" and it's context is from Daniel 4. God enabled Daniel to be able to interpret dreams, since back in the Old Testament times dreams were one of the ways that God spoke to people. King Nebuchadnezzar had a dream about a huge tree that was chopped down, and no one in Babylon (magicians, enchanters, fortune-tellers, etc.) was able to interpret it. Finally the king called on Daniel to interpret the dream for him, and Daniel basically told him that the dream meant good news and bad news. Bad news: "You will be driven away from human company and live with the wild animals. You will graze on grass like an ox. You will be soaked in heaven's dew. This will go on for seven seasons, and you will learn that the High God rules over human kingdoms and that he arranges all kingdom affairs." Good news: "Your kingdom will still be there for you after you learn that it is heaven that runs things."
One year later, David's interpretation came true. The king was in the midst of boasting about how great HIS kingdom was, and then a voice from heaven spoke, "Your kingdom is taken from you...the sentence is for seven seasons, enough time to learn that the High God rules human kingdoms and puts whomever he wishes in charge."
Seven years later, after living like a wild animal with long hair and nails and eating grass (!), Nebuchadnezzar came back and proclaimed, "At the end of that time, I, Nebuchadnezzar, raised my eyes toward heaven, and my sanity was restored. Then I praised the Most High; I honored and glorified him who lives forever. His dominion is an eternal dominion; his kingdom endures from generation to generation. All the peoples of the earth are regarded as nothing. He does as he pleases with the powers of heaven and the peoples of the earth. No one can hold back his hand or say to him: 'What have you done?'" (Daniel 4:34-35, NIV)
He was also given back his kingdom and was reestablished as king, and he said, "Now I, Nebuchadnezzar, praise and exalt and glorify the King of heaven, because everything he does is right and all his ways are just. And those who walk in pride he is able to humble." (Daniel 4:37)
Pastor's Key Points (with my thoughts sprinkled in):
1. I did that.
The king became proud and boasted about his kingdom. He said, "Look at this, Babylon the great! And I built it all by myself, a royal palace adequate to display my honor and glory!" (Daniel 4:30, MSG)
Nebuchadnezzar (what a great Bible name!) had an "it's all about me" attitude. This distorted view of reality undoubtedly floods our culture. I built this, I own this, I went here, I won this race, I got a perfect score, I want to eat this, I make this much money, I look good...etc. Don't get me wrong, it is good to have confidence in our God-given abilities. But we often tell ourselves or others these things in order to reinforce our self-worth and image of ourselves, and we leave God entirely out of the picture.
But what if instead, we went around saying-I am prideful? Or, God provided me with this? Or, that's the gift God gave me? All of the talents and gifts and blessings and opportunities that comprise our little kingdoms are ALL from God, no question about it. Would it take me seven years to realize this, like it did for the king? Well, I still have not learned this entirely, and I've lived for over three times the amount of time that it took the king!
"Every good and perfect gift comes from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows." (James 1:17, NIV)
2. God's Plan: Time is no issue.
God's plans, words, and directions for us are not time-sensitive. He does not operate on our schedule! Often times, we wait to hear God's "call" or direction in our lives...but then we get impatient if we don't hear a clear answer. Then we get prideful and think we can handle everything on our own. We settle into our little routines and think we can control them. We lose sight of reality and take on the "me" attitude--especially when our schedules get busier. Am I right?
An example the pastor used was regarding weddings--something that strikes a chord with me quite well! When he got to be in his late 20s, he became bitter about going to weddings because he thought he should be getting married himself, and he grew impatient with God for not knowing who his wife would be yet. These joyful events are amazing and wonderful to share with others and celebrate the unity of two people! But just because it may seem like everyone else is getting married does not mean that it's in God's timing or even in his plan at all for each of us to get married. It is so easy to become prideful and feel sorry for ourselves if we are not at that point yet, or in my case, even close to being at that point. However, it is so important to remain patient and prayerfully seek God's will in all circumstances before falling into the trap of bitterness. It's just not worth it! If we were all on the same "plan" for marriage, or any other big life event for that matter, what fun would that be? More importantly, God orchestrates every detail of our lives together, according to HIS timing, so that we can best serve him during each stage of our lives here on earth. Why do we doubt his timing when he is the one who created time in the first place?
3. Getting the mind right
I need to develop more humility and patience in order to see God's plans more clearly and with confidence. If I take on attempting to "figure out life" on my own, I am deliberately telling God that I don't trust him. I should not feel entitled to receive anything--any good or perfect gift--because I don't deserve them. Jesus paid the ultimate price for me to live as I am now, and after reading through the book of Matthew with my small group this summer, I am again struck by how ridiculous it is for me to think that I can take credit for any good things in my life. God has blessed me richly and loved me in spite of my brokenness, even though I deserve the exact opposite. Like we sang this morning, "if grace is an ocean, we're all sinking." Certainly, none of us will ever be perfect in this life, but if we are able to humble ourselves, then we can point to the only one who was perfect as we daily trust God's timing more than our own skewed version of it.
The last example the pastor used this morning was so representative of how we can aim to prevent falling into the trap of pride like King Nebuchadnezzar did. He told us to remember a time when we were performing--whether in a sport, concert, or something else where our parents were watching us and we were trying to do our best. I of course could think of many sports examples from when my parents were there to support me. He mentioned how even when there is a large audience watching you, usually you can see and hear your parents if they are cheering and showing how proud they are of you. We know where they are in the crowd. Naturally, we feel good when we make our parents proud, and also when we try to please other people. As an aside, people-pleasing may feel good in the short term, but it does not bring joy or satisfaction. But how much better would it be, and how much joy would we experience, when we see God's pride in us as he watches us in our everyday lives, doing his work and serving him wholeheartedly? So know where God is in the stands, and make him proud.
"Humble yourselves, therefore, under God's mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you." (1 Peter 5:6-7, NIV)
Summary of Daniel 4:
The sermon title was "Dreams of Falling" and it's context is from Daniel 4. God enabled Daniel to be able to interpret dreams, since back in the Old Testament times dreams were one of the ways that God spoke to people. King Nebuchadnezzar had a dream about a huge tree that was chopped down, and no one in Babylon (magicians, enchanters, fortune-tellers, etc.) was able to interpret it. Finally the king called on Daniel to interpret the dream for him, and Daniel basically told him that the dream meant good news and bad news. Bad news: "You will be driven away from human company and live with the wild animals. You will graze on grass like an ox. You will be soaked in heaven's dew. This will go on for seven seasons, and you will learn that the High God rules over human kingdoms and that he arranges all kingdom affairs." Good news: "Your kingdom will still be there for you after you learn that it is heaven that runs things."
One year later, David's interpretation came true. The king was in the midst of boasting about how great HIS kingdom was, and then a voice from heaven spoke, "Your kingdom is taken from you...the sentence is for seven seasons, enough time to learn that the High God rules human kingdoms and puts whomever he wishes in charge."
Seven years later, after living like a wild animal with long hair and nails and eating grass (!), Nebuchadnezzar came back and proclaimed, "At the end of that time, I, Nebuchadnezzar, raised my eyes toward heaven, and my sanity was restored. Then I praised the Most High; I honored and glorified him who lives forever. His dominion is an eternal dominion; his kingdom endures from generation to generation. All the peoples of the earth are regarded as nothing. He does as he pleases with the powers of heaven and the peoples of the earth. No one can hold back his hand or say to him: 'What have you done?'" (Daniel 4:34-35, NIV)
He was also given back his kingdom and was reestablished as king, and he said, "Now I, Nebuchadnezzar, praise and exalt and glorify the King of heaven, because everything he does is right and all his ways are just. And those who walk in pride he is able to humble." (Daniel 4:37)
Pastor's Key Points (with my thoughts sprinkled in):
1. I did that.
The king became proud and boasted about his kingdom. He said, "Look at this, Babylon the great! And I built it all by myself, a royal palace adequate to display my honor and glory!" (Daniel 4:30, MSG)
Nebuchadnezzar (what a great Bible name!) had an "it's all about me" attitude. This distorted view of reality undoubtedly floods our culture. I built this, I own this, I went here, I won this race, I got a perfect score, I want to eat this, I make this much money, I look good...etc. Don't get me wrong, it is good to have confidence in our God-given abilities. But we often tell ourselves or others these things in order to reinforce our self-worth and image of ourselves, and we leave God entirely out of the picture.
But what if instead, we went around saying-I am prideful? Or, God provided me with this? Or, that's the gift God gave me? All of the talents and gifts and blessings and opportunities that comprise our little kingdoms are ALL from God, no question about it. Would it take me seven years to realize this, like it did for the king? Well, I still have not learned this entirely, and I've lived for over three times the amount of time that it took the king!
"Every good and perfect gift comes from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows." (James 1:17, NIV)
2. God's Plan: Time is no issue.
God's plans, words, and directions for us are not time-sensitive. He does not operate on our schedule! Often times, we wait to hear God's "call" or direction in our lives...but then we get impatient if we don't hear a clear answer. Then we get prideful and think we can handle everything on our own. We settle into our little routines and think we can control them. We lose sight of reality and take on the "me" attitude--especially when our schedules get busier. Am I right?
An example the pastor used was regarding weddings--something that strikes a chord with me quite well! When he got to be in his late 20s, he became bitter about going to weddings because he thought he should be getting married himself, and he grew impatient with God for not knowing who his wife would be yet. These joyful events are amazing and wonderful to share with others and celebrate the unity of two people! But just because it may seem like everyone else is getting married does not mean that it's in God's timing or even in his plan at all for each of us to get married. It is so easy to become prideful and feel sorry for ourselves if we are not at that point yet, or in my case, even close to being at that point. However, it is so important to remain patient and prayerfully seek God's will in all circumstances before falling into the trap of bitterness. It's just not worth it! If we were all on the same "plan" for marriage, or any other big life event for that matter, what fun would that be? More importantly, God orchestrates every detail of our lives together, according to HIS timing, so that we can best serve him during each stage of our lives here on earth. Why do we doubt his timing when he is the one who created time in the first place?
3. Getting the mind right
I need to develop more humility and patience in order to see God's plans more clearly and with confidence. If I take on attempting to "figure out life" on my own, I am deliberately telling God that I don't trust him. I should not feel entitled to receive anything--any good or perfect gift--because I don't deserve them. Jesus paid the ultimate price for me to live as I am now, and after reading through the book of Matthew with my small group this summer, I am again struck by how ridiculous it is for me to think that I can take credit for any good things in my life. God has blessed me richly and loved me in spite of my brokenness, even though I deserve the exact opposite. Like we sang this morning, "if grace is an ocean, we're all sinking." Certainly, none of us will ever be perfect in this life, but if we are able to humble ourselves, then we can point to the only one who was perfect as we daily trust God's timing more than our own skewed version of it.
The last example the pastor used this morning was so representative of how we can aim to prevent falling into the trap of pride like King Nebuchadnezzar did. He told us to remember a time when we were performing--whether in a sport, concert, or something else where our parents were watching us and we were trying to do our best. I of course could think of many sports examples from when my parents were there to support me. He mentioned how even when there is a large audience watching you, usually you can see and hear your parents if they are cheering and showing how proud they are of you. We know where they are in the crowd. Naturally, we feel good when we make our parents proud, and also when we try to please other people. As an aside, people-pleasing may feel good in the short term, but it does not bring joy or satisfaction. But how much better would it be, and how much joy would we experience, when we see God's pride in us as he watches us in our everyday lives, doing his work and serving him wholeheartedly? So know where God is in the stands, and make him proud.
"Humble yourselves, therefore, under God's mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you." (1 Peter 5:6-7, NIV)
Thursday, May 19, 2011
Significance of "All Out Endurance" - Part 2
At long last, here is my continued explanation of "All Out Endurance" from what I experienced in my first year of grad school. Enjoy!
This year, God nudged me to take a baby step of faith and allow him to set the pace. Maybe it was from the routine of training competitively for the previous 10 years, but I still had the passion to compete as the marathon training tapered off in September and October. Even after a great summer of feeling relief and excitement to move on from collegiate running, I felt all along like I was waiting for something. At first, I saw the Chicago Marathon as that light at the end of the tunnel—that is what I had been training for, so naturally that’s what I thought my anticipation came from. However, the marathon came and went—even though it was a great experience, I hadn’t met my goal and I was mainly just satisfied that I finished it without walking.
About a month before that 26.2-mile test of endurance, I met with the cross country and track coach here. I had one season left of athletic eligibility, except it was only for an indoor track season. In track, generally the outdoor season is given more emphasis and the indoor season is just used as preparation for outdoor, so I had figured it wasn’t worth it to run another season. Plus, this was a Division I school—it’s not like I could really make an impact with the high level of competition. And anyway, who was I to jump onto a brand new team for a couple months and attempt to train with these intense athletes? I hadn't been that accomplished of a runner even at the DIII level during undergrad, so why did I think I could succeed on a team like this? It was time to focus more on my education and future career as a coach, not keep trying to be an athlete. Despite my uncertainties, I talked with the coach and started practicing with the team. I figured I could just see how long I'd last until I realized for myself that it was time to stop chasing this crazy dream of mine.
To make an already long story longer, my first and last season on this new team turned out to be the breakout season I had always dreamed of having. Even though I was skeptical of how the different training would affect my races, I surprised myself by running all-time PR's during our first meets in January. Over the course of the indoor season, my times plummeted by 11 or so seconds in the mile and 28 seconds in the 3000m. I ended up having the opportunity to run three events at the conference championships, and all three races are ones I will never forget. Furthermore, I decided to keep training with the team through the rest of the school year because I couldn't imagine just stopping when my teammates still had the outdoor season ahead. Even though I raced unattached and was out of eligibility, my teammates and coaches still saw me as part of the team. I had more of a carefree training regimen, which basically meant I tried to race whenever I had the opportunity! Timewise, I dropped 29 seconds in my favorite outdoor race (steeplechase), 14 seconds in the 1500m, and about 6 minutes in a half marathon.
I can attribute many factors to my performance improvements that I will not get into much here, but without a doubt the new coaches and teammates I had played a huge role with that aspect. However, there was so much more to this past season than the race results, or the “quantitative” element to running that I have always loved. I learned to take a tiptoe of faith every day I arrived at practice. I overcame a multitude of doubts, and with each doubt I knocked down, another pillar of confidence rose up. I got to know my teammates more, and even though I respected them, I slowly lost my initial feelings of intimidation and fear. My coach challenged me to work harder than I ever had before. I got stronger in the weight room and pushed through brutal track workouts, and I was sore every single day. I set aside one of my past fears that I would burn out from working so hard—but I reasoned if everyone else could push through the training, I could suck it up for a few more weeks too. My teammates pushed me to be better, and somehow said I inspired them in return. In all honesty, I gave everything I had because I had nothing to lose. The pressure of reaching any of my past expectations was gone, because this season was a gift. I wanted to get the most out of it that I was given because it was truly an unexpected act of grace. In short, it became clear to me how God had worked through the multitude of good, bad, and neutral details that transpired throughout this season, and I am amazed that he decided to use me as part of his larger plan.
This year has been so much different than I had imagined it would be. I knew moving here and not knowing anyone would be a big change, and I was ready for change. However, I decided to pursue one more track season only because I felt like God was nudging me towards it. Not only did he show me this was where he wanted me this year, but he also expected me to go all out for this team. Of course I failed on numerous occasions and do not want to gloss over my imperfections, because I had many humbling and learning experiences this year. However - God works in mysterious ways, and I learned it is infinitely better to live according to his plans rather than trying to stick to my own self-centered and detail-ridden agenda. This story just scratches the surface of the ways that God has worked in my life this year—but if there is one encompassing thing I’ve learned, it’s that going all out is worth it. The sooner I recognized that (and continue to remind myself of it!), the sooner I could let God work in me and through me to run—and live—with purpose, joy, and endurance.
This year, God nudged me to take a baby step of faith and allow him to set the pace. Maybe it was from the routine of training competitively for the previous 10 years, but I still had the passion to compete as the marathon training tapered off in September and October. Even after a great summer of feeling relief and excitement to move on from collegiate running, I felt all along like I was waiting for something. At first, I saw the Chicago Marathon as that light at the end of the tunnel—that is what I had been training for, so naturally that’s what I thought my anticipation came from. However, the marathon came and went—even though it was a great experience, I hadn’t met my goal and I was mainly just satisfied that I finished it without walking.
About a month before that 26.2-mile test of endurance, I met with the cross country and track coach here. I had one season left of athletic eligibility, except it was only for an indoor track season. In track, generally the outdoor season is given more emphasis and the indoor season is just used as preparation for outdoor, so I had figured it wasn’t worth it to run another season. Plus, this was a Division I school—it’s not like I could really make an impact with the high level of competition. And anyway, who was I to jump onto a brand new team for a couple months and attempt to train with these intense athletes? I hadn't been that accomplished of a runner even at the DIII level during undergrad, so why did I think I could succeed on a team like this? It was time to focus more on my education and future career as a coach, not keep trying to be an athlete. Despite my uncertainties, I talked with the coach and started practicing with the team. I figured I could just see how long I'd last until I realized for myself that it was time to stop chasing this crazy dream of mine.
To make an already long story longer, my first and last season on this new team turned out to be the breakout season I had always dreamed of having. Even though I was skeptical of how the different training would affect my races, I surprised myself by running all-time PR's during our first meets in January. Over the course of the indoor season, my times plummeted by 11 or so seconds in the mile and 28 seconds in the 3000m. I ended up having the opportunity to run three events at the conference championships, and all three races are ones I will never forget. Furthermore, I decided to keep training with the team through the rest of the school year because I couldn't imagine just stopping when my teammates still had the outdoor season ahead. Even though I raced unattached and was out of eligibility, my teammates and coaches still saw me as part of the team. I had more of a carefree training regimen, which basically meant I tried to race whenever I had the opportunity! Timewise, I dropped 29 seconds in my favorite outdoor race (steeplechase), 14 seconds in the 1500m, and about 6 minutes in a half marathon.
I can attribute many factors to my performance improvements that I will not get into much here, but without a doubt the new coaches and teammates I had played a huge role with that aspect. However, there was so much more to this past season than the race results, or the “quantitative” element to running that I have always loved. I learned to take a tiptoe of faith every day I arrived at practice. I overcame a multitude of doubts, and with each doubt I knocked down, another pillar of confidence rose up. I got to know my teammates more, and even though I respected them, I slowly lost my initial feelings of intimidation and fear. My coach challenged me to work harder than I ever had before. I got stronger in the weight room and pushed through brutal track workouts, and I was sore every single day. I set aside one of my past fears that I would burn out from working so hard—but I reasoned if everyone else could push through the training, I could suck it up for a few more weeks too. My teammates pushed me to be better, and somehow said I inspired them in return. In all honesty, I gave everything I had because I had nothing to lose. The pressure of reaching any of my past expectations was gone, because this season was a gift. I wanted to get the most out of it that I was given because it was truly an unexpected act of grace. In short, it became clear to me how God had worked through the multitude of good, bad, and neutral details that transpired throughout this season, and I am amazed that he decided to use me as part of his larger plan.
This year has been so much different than I had imagined it would be. I knew moving here and not knowing anyone would be a big change, and I was ready for change. However, I decided to pursue one more track season only because I felt like God was nudging me towards it. Not only did he show me this was where he wanted me this year, but he also expected me to go all out for this team. Of course I failed on numerous occasions and do not want to gloss over my imperfections, because I had many humbling and learning experiences this year. However - God works in mysterious ways, and I learned it is infinitely better to live according to his plans rather than trying to stick to my own self-centered and detail-ridden agenda. This story just scratches the surface of the ways that God has worked in my life this year—but if there is one encompassing thing I’ve learned, it’s that going all out is worth it. The sooner I recognized that (and continue to remind myself of it!), the sooner I could let God work in me and through me to run—and live—with purpose, joy, and endurance.
Sunday, May 1, 2011
Quick thoughts
Clearly it has been quite some time and I am long overdue for an update...life is busy, but so good. Part 2 will be coming once the school year wraps up!
I am realizing more and more that I am a better writer than I am at giving speeches...but from the unprepared ramblings I gave tonight at the track banquet, it seems (almost humorously) like my main point came across: that God's plans are just plain better than our own. This has been a central theme for me over the past year. God has been so patient with me as I have doubted, hesitated, and then...slowly...still-not-quite-fully-surrendering-but-at-least-acknowledging...the simple TRUTH that his plans are just SO MUCH BETTER than anything I could ever come up with in my own agenda! I want to believe, proclaim, and live according to this truth. God is always up to something; all we need to do is be ready to jump on board for the ride and let him work!
How to sum this up? Well, God said this to Paul some time ago, but I'd have to say it applies to our lives today QUITE well: “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”
Then Paul responded, "Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong." (see 2 Corinthians 12 for context)
Over and out. Finish strong!
I am realizing more and more that I am a better writer than I am at giving speeches...but from the unprepared ramblings I gave tonight at the track banquet, it seems (almost humorously) like my main point came across: that God's plans are just plain better than our own. This has been a central theme for me over the past year. God has been so patient with me as I have doubted, hesitated, and then...slowly...still-not-quite-fully-surrendering-but-at-least-acknowledging...the simple TRUTH that his plans are just SO MUCH BETTER than anything I could ever come up with in my own agenda! I want to believe, proclaim, and live according to this truth. God is always up to something; all we need to do is be ready to jump on board for the ride and let him work!
How to sum this up? Well, God said this to Paul some time ago, but I'd have to say it applies to our lives today QUITE well: “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”
Then Paul responded, "Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong." (see 2 Corinthians 12 for context)
Over and out. Finish strong!
Sunday, February 27, 2011
Significance of "All Out Endurance" - Part 1
Well, I have delayed in explaining the title of this blog. All Out Endurance...this phrase appealed to me because I am a distance runner, and also because it wasn't taken already! In all seriousness, I had a lot of options for blog titles before I decided on this one, most of which had to do with the many parallels that exist between faith, life, running, and sports in general. I don't remember exactly how I thought of these three words together, but it was probably on one of the long runs I did before the Chicago Marathon last October. Let me tell you, when you are running for 2-3 hours alone, the mind thinks up all kinds of things! Probably the mix of endorphins, boredom, and physical fatigue all contributed to allowing my brain to think just a little more creatively than it usually does.
In itself, all out endurance is a paradox to the running world; I can't be physically going "all out" and yet pace myself at the same time. In shorter races, I can go all out physically, never settling in to a position or pace. At the least, I can be intently focused on the finish line, so that when I cross it, I know I couldn't have given anything else. But in a race like a marathon (or even something as "short" as a 5k), it would be ridiculous to go "all out" over the 26.2 mile course. In a marathon, endurance is the key. Now I personally can't speak from experience on how it feels to finish a marathon the right way--after going out too fast the first 10 miles and just trying not to walk the last 10 miles in 80 degree weather--but no matter what, anyone who attempts to finish should have used a pretty decent amount of physical endurance in covering that distance on foot! However, to say that the effort was all out would be inaccurate, because marathoners know they cannot give 100% of their effort for 3+ hours or they would die trying.
So if it is not possible in running to have all out endurance, why is this my theme? Even in other things, if I give 100% to something 100% of the time, won't I eventually burn out? Get sick of it? Quit? For most things, this is probably true. Everyone needs a physical and mental break from time to time or else we will certainly "break" down in one way or another. However, I believe there is one thing, at least that I have experienced, that we can go all out for, all the time.
There are so many analogies people make between having faith in God and things we do--running, working, celebrating, learning, serving, and a multitude of other actions and parts of life. But all analogies lose their value at some point because there is nothing, NOTHING in this world that can be compared with our God. I have never been more certain that he is worth going all out for; he will restore me when I fall; he knows me better than I know myself; he loves me no matter what; he is always perfectly unchanging; he will help me to endure, and not only endure but to embrace pain and experience joy through it all; he has suffered more than I could ever imagine, much less experience myself; and, finally, he is everything! Nothing else really matters in the grand scheme of things, and nothing else should matter more than giving glory to God for loving us, creating us, paying the ultimate price to save us, and wanting us to follow him and accept the grace he offers. All around, God himself best exemplifies all out endurance because he has always given 100%, will continue to give 100%, and has endured everything for our sake through his son.
This all may be starting to sound a little abstract, so I will attempt to illustrate of how I've recently seen his plans at work and his presence in my life. But first, some background: about 8 years ago, I decided I would try to become a great runner. God has blessed me with athletic talent, and I have always loved sports. I also played basketball, soccer and softball competitively, but by the end of my high school career I felt most confident and passionate about cross country and track. I had also developed my closest friendships through these teams and learned a good amount of life lessons in the process. During my undergraduate experience, I was a part of an amazing team and have so many great memories from each season. I developed as a runner slowly and struggled through various issues along the way, but finished with much-improved junior and senior seasons. However, even though I became "fast" by my standards at the time, I struggled not to define myself in comparison with other runners' performances, including those of my teammates. Like many college athletes, I dreamed of becoming an All-American or part of a national championship team. In itself, these were good goals to have and many of my teammates shared these dreams with me. Looking back I think I kept other things in perspective to running at times, but I know I also allowed running to take priority more often than it should have.
Without going into many unnecessary details, my senior year ended up being frustrating and disappointing from a running standpoint. Despite the fact that my race times had improved, I had expected more of myself and did not run at a national meet like I had the opportunity to do twice my junior year. I struggled with pride issues before, and I had allowed it to creep back into my thoughts; also, I went back to defining myself by how I performed in races. Even though I had some regrets from competing, I tried to see the bigger picture and honestly "get over myself" because clearly, I needed to realize that there was much more to life than college running. Much of what happened throughout the year had been out of my control, and more importantly I was still so happy to have been part of the awesome community that made up our team! However, I decided that after track season I would need another goal to keep me from going into withdrawal, so I signed up for the marathon in April and decided to raise money for a charity through it. After having decided on summer and grad school plans, I figured I would be done with competing on a team since I had used up all but one season of indoor track eligibility, and I was ready to be done. I was physically and mentally ready to move on and hang up the racing spikes for good.
"What we've learned is this: God does not respond to what we do; we respond to what God does. We've finally figured it out. Our lives get in step with God and all others by letting him set the pace, not by proudly or anxiously trying to run the parade." (Romans 3:28, MSG)
In itself, all out endurance is a paradox to the running world; I can't be physically going "all out" and yet pace myself at the same time. In shorter races, I can go all out physically, never settling in to a position or pace. At the least, I can be intently focused on the finish line, so that when I cross it, I know I couldn't have given anything else. But in a race like a marathon (or even something as "short" as a 5k), it would be ridiculous to go "all out" over the 26.2 mile course. In a marathon, endurance is the key. Now I personally can't speak from experience on how it feels to finish a marathon the right way--after going out too fast the first 10 miles and just trying not to walk the last 10 miles in 80 degree weather--but no matter what, anyone who attempts to finish should have used a pretty decent amount of physical endurance in covering that distance on foot! However, to say that the effort was all out would be inaccurate, because marathoners know they cannot give 100% of their effort for 3+ hours or they would die trying.
So if it is not possible in running to have all out endurance, why is this my theme? Even in other things, if I give 100% to something 100% of the time, won't I eventually burn out? Get sick of it? Quit? For most things, this is probably true. Everyone needs a physical and mental break from time to time or else we will certainly "break" down in one way or another. However, I believe there is one thing, at least that I have experienced, that we can go all out for, all the time.
There are so many analogies people make between having faith in God and things we do--running, working, celebrating, learning, serving, and a multitude of other actions and parts of life. But all analogies lose their value at some point because there is nothing, NOTHING in this world that can be compared with our God. I have never been more certain that he is worth going all out for; he will restore me when I fall; he knows me better than I know myself; he loves me no matter what; he is always perfectly unchanging; he will help me to endure, and not only endure but to embrace pain and experience joy through it all; he has suffered more than I could ever imagine, much less experience myself; and, finally, he is everything! Nothing else really matters in the grand scheme of things, and nothing else should matter more than giving glory to God for loving us, creating us, paying the ultimate price to save us, and wanting us to follow him and accept the grace he offers. All around, God himself best exemplifies all out endurance because he has always given 100%, will continue to give 100%, and has endured everything for our sake through his son.
This all may be starting to sound a little abstract, so I will attempt to illustrate of how I've recently seen his plans at work and his presence in my life. But first, some background: about 8 years ago, I decided I would try to become a great runner. God has blessed me with athletic talent, and I have always loved sports. I also played basketball, soccer and softball competitively, but by the end of my high school career I felt most confident and passionate about cross country and track. I had also developed my closest friendships through these teams and learned a good amount of life lessons in the process. During my undergraduate experience, I was a part of an amazing team and have so many great memories from each season. I developed as a runner slowly and struggled through various issues along the way, but finished with much-improved junior and senior seasons. However, even though I became "fast" by my standards at the time, I struggled not to define myself in comparison with other runners' performances, including those of my teammates. Like many college athletes, I dreamed of becoming an All-American or part of a national championship team. In itself, these were good goals to have and many of my teammates shared these dreams with me. Looking back I think I kept other things in perspective to running at times, but I know I also allowed running to take priority more often than it should have.
Without going into many unnecessary details, my senior year ended up being frustrating and disappointing from a running standpoint. Despite the fact that my race times had improved, I had expected more of myself and did not run at a national meet like I had the opportunity to do twice my junior year. I struggled with pride issues before, and I had allowed it to creep back into my thoughts; also, I went back to defining myself by how I performed in races. Even though I had some regrets from competing, I tried to see the bigger picture and honestly "get over myself" because clearly, I needed to realize that there was much more to life than college running. Much of what happened throughout the year had been out of my control, and more importantly I was still so happy to have been part of the awesome community that made up our team! However, I decided that after track season I would need another goal to keep me from going into withdrawal, so I signed up for the marathon in April and decided to raise money for a charity through it. After having decided on summer and grad school plans, I figured I would be done with competing on a team since I had used up all but one season of indoor track eligibility, and I was ready to be done. I was physically and mentally ready to move on and hang up the racing spikes for good.
"What we've learned is this: God does not respond to what we do; we respond to what God does. We've finally figured it out. Our lives get in step with God and all others by letting him set the pace, not by proudly or anxiously trying to run the parade." (Romans 3:28, MSG)
Thursday, February 10, 2011
Baby Steps
At Fusion (translation: the Bible study I've been going to this year) last week, we discussed the spiritual discipline of studying scripture. A couple verses stick out to me related to, well, reading the Bible, although there are many more:
Hebrews 4:12--For the word of God is living and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.
Psalm 119:11--I have hidden your word in my heart, that I might not sin against you.
A few things stuck out to me about our discussion. First, it was refreshing to hear that there is no right or wrong method to reading the Bible. Just like we have different learning styles and ways to study for tests, we can get more out of the Bible depending on what works for us. For instance, some people try to read through the Bible in one year. While for some this may be challenging and effective, others (myself included) inevitably fall behind on the reading schedule and then feel like we have to catch up. Then, the focus becomes just getting through the readings for the day instead of trying to understand, learn, and apply the scripture. Or maybe we just miss a few days and give up. The same goes for reading one chapter a day or memorizing a passage--when the feeling of accomplishment takes priority over the actual time spent with God, our priorities need some adjusting! So, if one method hasn't been working, try a different way of reading scripture!
I recently finished a daily devotional and am in the process of exploring new ways of reading scripture. The daily devotional was helpful and had a wealth of great thoughts, but I admit that a lot of times I read it because I "had" to that day. While long-term goals that take a lot of daily motivation are good to keep us accountable, I think it's very important to set short-term goals, aka "baby steps," like in the movie What About Bob? Also, it makes sense to set smaller goals in order to be able to see the progress you make if you are able to stick to less-sizable goals. Just like I tell my jogging classes, it's important to make sure the goals you set are both realistic and measurable! :)
So far all this is to say that as Christians, we should be reading scripture on a regular basis. Not only do we need it, we should want to spend time learning and growing through the handbook God gave us! One of the last things I remember from our Bible study last week was that with anything...If you really care about it, you find time to do it. Think about it. Even if I have a super busy schedule, I still ALWAYS find the time to eat, check email, go on Facebook, run, go to class, or do a number of other things that I value as important. If reading the Bible means something to you, you should be able to find the time to read it! This was very convicting for me.
The above link is just something I came across on biblegateway.com. It shows the top 10 most searched-for Bible verses. Enjoy!I recently finished a daily devotional and am in the process of exploring new ways of reading scripture. The daily devotional was helpful and had a wealth of great thoughts, but I admit that a lot of times I read it because I "had" to that day. While long-term goals that take a lot of daily motivation are good to keep us accountable, I think it's very important to set short-term goals, aka "baby steps," like in the movie What About Bob? Also, it makes sense to set smaller goals in order to be able to see the progress you make if you are able to stick to less-sizable goals. Just like I tell my jogging classes, it's important to make sure the goals you set are both realistic and measurable! :)
So far all this is to say that as Christians, we should be reading scripture on a regular basis. Not only do we need it, we should want to spend time learning and growing through the handbook God gave us! One of the last things I remember from our Bible study last week was that with anything...If you really care about it, you find time to do it. Think about it. Even if I have a super busy schedule, I still ALWAYS find the time to eat, check email, go on Facebook, run, go to class, or do a number of other things that I value as important. If reading the Bible means something to you, you should be able to find the time to read it! This was very convicting for me.
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
C.S. Lewis
I am stealing this quote from an article I just read, and from C.S. Lewis' book Mere Christianity. Call me a double-thief, but this quote is worth it. I read this book back in high school but didn't understand it/make the effort to understand it as well as I should have. Maybe I'll be re-adding it to my summer reading list just to brush up, but since it's snowing now...
"If I find in myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world. If none of my earthly pleasures satisfy it that does not prove that the universe is a fraud. Probably earthly pleasures were never meant to satisfy it, but only to arouse it, to suggest the real thing. If that is so, I must take care, on the one hand, never to despise, or be unthankful for, these earthly blessings, and on the other, never to mistake them for the something else of which they are only a kind of copy, or echo, or mirage. I must keep alive in myself the desire for my true country, which I shall not find till after death; I must never let it get snowed under or turned aside; I must make it the main object of life to press on to that other country and to help others to do the same."
"If I find in myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world. If none of my earthly pleasures satisfy it that does not prove that the universe is a fraud. Probably earthly pleasures were never meant to satisfy it, but only to arouse it, to suggest the real thing. If that is so, I must take care, on the one hand, never to despise, or be unthankful for, these earthly blessings, and on the other, never to mistake them for the something else of which they are only a kind of copy, or echo, or mirage. I must keep alive in myself the desire for my true country, which I shall not find till after death; I must never let it get snowed under or turned aside; I must make it the main object of life to press on to that other country and to help others to do the same."
Sunday, January 9, 2011
Fresh feeling
Well, the spring semester starts tomorrow. Unsurprisingly, Christmas break went by fast and I did not update like I had intended, but that was in part due to a varying schedule, being in different places, and just not having any "aha! i want to blog about that!" moments. As a whole, I had a lot of great experiences with family and friends, and it was cool to revisit parts of my life that have shaped me into who I am today.
Over the last year or so, the following passage has come up repeatedly in my life, particularly in a devotional book and other unexpected places (too unexpected to be mere coincidence, I think):
"So here's what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life--your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life--and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don't become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You'll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you."(Romans 12:1-2, The Message)
Here's the NIV version, probably a bit more familiar:
"Therefore, I urge, you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God--this is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is--his good, pleasing and perfect will."
I think this passage can speak for itself in a lot of ways. For the record, I like to replace "going-to-work, and walking-around life..." with "going-to-class, and running-around life...". I'm a grad student, and a runner, so there :) Anyway, when I'm feeling bogged down and overwhelmed, I need to remember what I'm focusing on--are the various things I'm involved with an offering to God, or am I thinking about my own agenda and my purposes for everything I'm doing?
This semester, I would like to read through the "wisdom" books of the Bible, including Job, Psalms, Proverbs, and Ecclesiastes. I hope to develop some "well-formed maturity" and not put off trying to make my faith more my own.
I have a lot more rolling around in my head, but it will have to wait til next time since Monday is going to hit hard! I'll close with this hymn's refrain, a vivid reminder of what life is really all about...
Turn your eyes upon Jesus,
Look full in His wonderful face,
And the things of earth will grow strangely dim,
In the light of His glory and grace.
Over the last year or so, the following passage has come up repeatedly in my life, particularly in a devotional book and other unexpected places (too unexpected to be mere coincidence, I think):
"So here's what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life--your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life--and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don't become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You'll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you."(Romans 12:1-2, The Message)
Here's the NIV version, probably a bit more familiar:
"Therefore, I urge, you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God--this is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is--his good, pleasing and perfect will."
I think this passage can speak for itself in a lot of ways. For the record, I like to replace "going-to-work, and walking-around life..." with "going-to-class, and running-around life...". I'm a grad student, and a runner, so there :) Anyway, when I'm feeling bogged down and overwhelmed, I need to remember what I'm focusing on--are the various things I'm involved with an offering to God, or am I thinking about my own agenda and my purposes for everything I'm doing?
This semester, I would like to read through the "wisdom" books of the Bible, including Job, Psalms, Proverbs, and Ecclesiastes. I hope to develop some "well-formed maturity" and not put off trying to make my faith more my own.
I have a lot more rolling around in my head, but it will have to wait til next time since Monday is going to hit hard! I'll close with this hymn's refrain, a vivid reminder of what life is really all about...
Turn your eyes upon Jesus,
Look full in His wonderful face,
And the things of earth will grow strangely dim,
In the light of His glory and grace.
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